


until next time

by bakuwrites



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:41:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25917490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bakuwrites/pseuds/bakuwrites
Summary: “I met you at a very strange time in my life. I loved you so much I forgot what hating myself felt like. I’m waiting, Tooru.”“Perhaps, next time, the right people will get the time right and have their chance.”
Relationships: Hanamaki Takahiro & Matsukawa Issei, Hanamaki Takahiro/Matsukawa Issei, Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Kudos: 8





	until next time

**Author's Note:**

> Please be observant with the timestamps in order for you to avoid getting confused. I would like to thank my Ate, @koushkoushi (anitwt acc) for proofreading this fic. Enjoy reading! :))

He’s here again. Oikawa thought. 

Every time he sees Iwaizumi dining in his café, the guy always seems to space out. His dull eyes were downcast, a sad and lonely sight. I wonder what’s happening going on in his mind every time he spaces out. His thoughts go haywire when he looks at Iwaizumi. Maybe because he looked depressed or maybe because Iwaizumi reminded Oikawa of a certain person. A sharp pang of pain hit his chest; looking at Iwaizumi made Oikawa think of someone. He shrugged his thoughts and called Iwaizumi.

“One Americano for Mr. Iwaizumi!” Oikawa called out then repeats it when he heard no response.

A brunette guy suddenly appeared before Iwaizumi’s sight. He raised an eyebrow and asked, “What is it?”

The man gave a soft smile and replied, “Sir your coffee’s done. I called you. Five times. I thought you were deaf.” 

What the fuck is his problem? I know I was spacing out for I think 30 minutes but that one was uncalled for. Iwaizumi thought as he glares at the man in front of him.  
“Well, I think now you know that I'm NOT.” 

Iwaizumi’s tone was harsher than usual. Maybe because he got flashbacks of his awful past or he was irritated by the presence of the brunette in front of him, or maybe both. He picked up his coffee and left a bill without uttering another word.

Oikawa goes back to the counter with a frown on his face. “What’s wrong Tooru? You looked down in the dumps. Oh, wait did your boyfriend dump you?” Hanamaki guessed. He got no answer from Oikawa and that made Hanamaki tease Oikawa even more.

“Shut up Makki. I’m the one who dumped, Ushiwaka, please remember that. Stop teasing me and go back to work!” 

Oikawa rolled his eyes and started making coffee for their customers. “Ah what a waste! You look good but your attitude sucks. 1/10 would not recommend.” 

Kunimi gets close to Hanamaki and both of them looked at Oikawa, 

“Is he still talking about the coffee or the customer before?” Kunimi asked. 

Hanamaki just shrugged his thoughts away. When Oikawa’s in a mood bad, he tends to throw tantrums at anyone who so much as looks at him. He knew better than to approach that sulking man and get doomed.

A week quickly passed. Iwaizumi always tends to work overtime for it is the only time that he can work freely and he feels productive when no one’s around him. 

“Wow, I feel more motivated than usual. If I’m going to pull an all-nighter I should probably buy coffee.” Iwaizumi stood up, put his jacket on his back, and immediately started walking out from his office.

“Good evening Sir! Welcome to Seijoh’s Café!” Oikawa greeted but Iwaizumi just shrugged him off and looked at the menu. Oikawa kept the smile on his face but in his mind, he’s ready to shout at Iwaizumi at any moment. “Asshole.” He mumbled. Oikawa starts clicking his phone until Iwaizumi broke the ice between them.  
“Excuse me?” Iwaizumi asked to confirm if he heard someone called him an asshole. 

Oikawa looked at him and then smile, “Yes Sir? May I take your order?” 

Iwaizumi glared at Oikawa then smirked. “One Americano, asshole.” 

Oikawa’s eyes widened and that made Iwaizumi smile teasingly. He put the money on the counter and searched for a table as he waits for his coffee to be served.  
“What the fuck, he heard that?” Oikawa keeps on mumbling, his cheeks flushed out of embarrassment. “One Americano please!” Oikawa shouted. 

“Copy that, Asshole.” Oikawa grimaces, he slowly raised his middle finger but that doesn’t stop Hanamaki in laughing and keeps calling him an asshole. Hearing his workmate’s teasing made him put his palm on his face. Oikawa let out a deep sigh and took a glimpse of Iwaizumi. He can still see the teasing smile on Iwaizumi’s face and that made him realized something.

“Well, I guess that one was worth it. I get to see you smile today.”

Oikawa looked at Hanamaki only to find his workmate looking at him with disgust on his face. “Whipped culture, I think.” He doesn’t mind what his workmate said, he fixed his hair before he brings the coffee to Iwaizumi’s table. He rashly walks towards Iwaizumi but unfortunately, this day couldn’t get any worse for Oikawa. The coffee spilled on Iwaizumi’s pants and that made him groan for a moment.

“Shit that was sexy.” Oikawa thought but he shrugged it anyway, “Sir I’m very sorry.” His heartbeat skyrocketed when Iwaizumi looked at his pants and then looked at him.  
Iwaizumi closed his eyes, “Hajime calm yourself. You still have tons to do. You shouldn’t be preoccupied with negative thoughts right now.” He uttered to himself. Meanwhile, Oikawa was getting ready to be yelled at but lucky him, Iwaizumi chooses to take no notice of the little mishap.

“We can do nothing about it just give me a tissue.” 

Oikawa’s eyes peeled and immediately stood up to get some tissues.

“Oikawa-san what the hell are you doing?! I know you’re irritated at his presence but that doesn’t mean that you can spill the coffee on him.” Kunimi keeps talking and all but Oikawa was dumbfounded walking while getting tissues and immediately advances towards Iwaizumi’s table. Hanamaki walks beside him and gave a newly made Americano with cookies to appease Iwaizumi on what happened earlier.

“I’m okay with the Americano no need for the cookies.” Iwaizumi attempted to give back the cookies but he failed. 

“No Sir, please accept it that’s the least we could do. We’re very sorry.” Hanamaki keeps apologizing to Iwaizumi but little did he know, he no longer got Iwaizumi’s attention for his eyes is locked on the poor Oikawa that’s being scolded by his workmates.

“Sir? Is this enough? Or would you like to get more coo− “, Iwaizumi looked back at Hanamaki and grabbed the food that is being offered to him. He gave thanks and reassured Hanamaki that he’s alright and left the café afterward.

-Aoba Avenue Hotel – 11:45 pm-

“Oh, the lights still on? Did Haj forgot to turn it off?” the man keeps asking things to himself. As he closes the gap between him and their office he heard something.

“Ugh. Fuck this, I can’t concentrate.”

The man opened the door just to find out that Iwaizumi is still working. 

“What the heck, Hajime? Why are you still here?” 

Iwaizumi stunned on his seat. He looked at the door and found his friend, Matsukawa Issei. He sighed knowing where the noise came from.  
“I should be the one asking that to you, Mattsun.” Iwaizumi replied. 

Matsukawa awkwardly smiles and scratches his head. “Is it really weird if you see me in the office late at night?” 

Iwaizumi nodded, “Yes, you said your boyfriend hates it when you’re overworking yourself right.” 

The words that Iwaizumi uttered sounds bitter and that gave Matsukawa a reason to tease him. “Wow, that sounds bitter, dude. Anyways, I just forgot something and I’m waiting for my /boyfriend/ to finish his night shift.” Iwaizumi just rolled his eyes. It’s already midnight and Iwaizumi called it a day.

“I’m going here (points at the right side) I’m picking up my /boyfriend. /” Matsukawa gave a playful smile but Iwaizumi just pushes him away because he looked whipped and it disgusts him. Iwaizumi keep walking until he saw a familiar face by the waiting shed.

“He looks depressed.” Iwaizumi thought. He knew, of course. He was the one who made him feel like that. Even though mostly it’s Oikawa’s fault but he still felt responsible for what happened. Iwaizumi went closer to Oikawa. He purposely coughs in order for Oikawa to acknowledge his presence but unfortunately, he failed for Oikawa’s dumbfounded sitting on the bench. In attempts to make Oikawa look at him, he pokes Oikawa’s shoulders.

“Hello? Are you okay?”

Oikawa absentmindedly nodded. He pokes him again and again until Oikawa got back to his senses. He looked up just to find the man who he inconvenienced him is standing in front. At that moment he was reminded of what happened earlier that day and suddenly he burst into tears.

Iwaizumi was surprised. He looked left and right to see if there are people watching them. After checking it he uttered, “What? Why are you crying?” a frown grew on his face. Iwaizumi does not have long patience but out of nowhere and with someone who he barely knows, he waited until Oikawa calms down.

“Sir, I’m sorry about what happened earlier.” Oikawa looks down at his feet while apologizing. Iwaizumi stared at him. 

“When you’re apologizing to someone you should look them straight in the eyes.” To be honest, Iwaizumi isn’t mad or anything. He just wants to tease Oikawa in exchange for what happened earlier. But Oikawa took it seriously and their eyes locked. At some point it made Iwaizumi felt shivers down his spine. Oikawa did what Iwaizumi said and Iwaizumi will be lying if he said Oikawa looks ugly when he’s crying. 

Cute. He thought.

The grab that Oikawa booked finally arrived. He once again apologizes for the mishap and bid his goodbye. Before Iwaizumi utter words, Oikawa was no longer in front of him. 

-Aoba Avenue Hotel – 8:30 am-

Two weeks passed but Oikawa’s crying face kept playing in Iwaizumi’s mind. He tried to visit the café every night but he always goes home with the feel of being defeated. “Does this mean he was fired that night?” he asked himself. “Fuck Hajime what did you do?”. He keeps mumbling to himself until Matsukawa stood up.

“Dude what are you doing? You’re creeping me out.” He complained.

Now Iwaizumi ignored the other man’s attempt to teasing him because he’s too preoccupied with the thought he had a few minutes earlier. “Mattsun, what should I do?” The other guy was too confused about Iwaizumi’s reaction. “Stop doing that face, I already have a boyfr−“, Iwaizumi turned his back on Matsukawa. “Okay! Okay! I’m serious this time. What happened?” 

After that Iwaizumi told everything that happened from that day. Matsukawa put his hand on his hips while the other one is on his chin. “Hmmm. It looks like you fell in love at first sight huh. Cliché shit.” Iwaizumi glares at him and that made Matsukawa laugh. “I’ve got an idea. You mentioned earlier that it was Seijoh’s Café right?” Iwaizumi was confused but still nodded anyway.

“Let’s go, Haj.”

“Go where?”

-Seijoh Café – 9:45 am-

“What are we doing here Mattsun? Didn’t I tell you he might’ve been fired that day?” Iwaizumi doesn’t understand why Mattsun took him there. He tried visiting every night but he failed. 

“Shut up just go.” Iwaizumi just follow what Mattsun said and find a free table.

“Hi, Sir may I take your order?” 

Iwaizumi was stunned on his seat. “Wait, you weren’t fired?”

Oikawa blinks, “Uhm, why would I get fired from my café?” those phrases sound surreal to Iwaizumi. He was still processing every information until Oikawa broke the ice. “Wait is this about what happened last week?” he asked and Iwaizumi nodded.

“Makki could you take over here please?”

“God Toruu you’re ruining our babe time.” Oikawa let his tongue out on Hanamaki that made Matsukawa laugh and let his boyfriend do his job.

-conversation-

Oikawa: I guess I startled you a little huh, Asshole.”

Iwaizumi: Shut up. I was just being responsible.

Oikawa: Yeah, you’re right. I keep seeing you visiting my café every night.

Iwaizumi: I’m visiting because of your product, not you.

Oikawa: Well If you say so.

Iwaizumi: Wait weren’t you being scolded that day?

Oikawa: Oh, I was just trying to experience what our servers do every day so I can make decisions that will help me look at their perspective as well.

Iwaizumi: Well, you got a point.

Oikawa: I know I always made sense when I’m talking.

Iwaizumi: Really?

They both gave each other a laugh.

Oikawa: Uhm do you still need anything?

Iwaizumi: Uh yeah.

Oikawa: What is it?

Iwaizumi: Can I get your number? I mean your café’s number so that I won’t go here every night.

Oikawa let out another laugh. “Here's my business card. Text me later”

For the first time in 3 years, Iwaizumi felt relieved. Like something heavy has been lifted from his chest. He felt at ease. He was arranging his things then he saw Oikawa’s business card. He debated with himself if he’s going to beep Oikawa’s phone or not but before he could even type something an unknown number was calling him.

“Uh hello? Who’s this?”

“H-hi asshole. *hik* A-are you busy *hik*”

“Are you drunk?”

“N-no. *hik* J-just tipsy. Hehe. I’m at Rookies”

Iwaizumi didn’t even bother to think where Oikawa got his number. He instantly gets his jacket and goes outside. After 20 minutes Iwaizumi arrived at Rookies. He saw a wasted Oikawa Tooru sitting in front of the bar.

“What the hell are you doing outside?”

Oikawa just smiled at him and blew air on Iwaizumi’s face. He made the latter close his eyes and pinch his nose because Oikawa’s breathe currently reeks of alcohol. Iwaizumi put Oikawa on his back and advances towards his car. Due to circumstances, Iwaizumi took Oikawa to his apartment. He put him on his bed and he even washed and change Oikawa’s t-shirt.

“If only I don’t take a liking to you I would’ve left you there, Shittykawa.”

While he was helping Oikawa put his clothes, the brunette suddenly put his arms on Iwaizumi’s nape and closed the gap between them. Iwaizumi was shocked but before he could take away Oikawa’s arms the latter kissed him.

“I like you. I really do.”

After Oikawa let out those phrases, he fell asleep as if nothing happened meanwhile Iwaizumi was there, sitting on the side of his bed while feeling his lips. He pinches his cheeks to confirm if it really happened or not.

Iwaizumi woke up a couple of hours later but instead of Oikawa laying on his bed, he saw a note. 

“Hi! I’m sorry for what happened last night! I’ll make sure to make it up to you. Coffee later?”

A smile plastered on his face. The day was longer than he expected, or maybe he was being impatient because he already wanted to see Oikawa’s face. Finally, the sun goes down and he immediately goes to where Oikawa is.

“Coffee or would you like to have a drink with me?”

“I feel like drinking tonight so let’s go with the latter.” 

−Rookies 9:00 pm−

Both of them are now drunk. Their heads spinning but they can still talk and all.

“Can I tell you a story?”

“What is it? Go on Iwa-chan, I’m listening.”

I grew up in a household where accomplishments are the tickets of getting love and affection from my parents. I always do what my parents say. I study hard to be on top, I joined competitions and tried my best to win them, I ran as student council president because that was the path both my parents used to pursue. All was well until I made a mistake.  
It happened before the summer of my third year in high school. Our school will compete for the Battle of the Wise 2014. It was my first time I was picked in BOW and I felt really thrilled.

−FLASHBACK in Iwaizumi’s household−

Everyone in the Iwaizumi’s household is eating in silence but there’s a presence that made Hajime feel tense and stiff. The ice broke after an old man started talking.

“Hajime, after two years of trying, you’re finally competing in the BOW. You should know this by now, don’t mess this up.” 

Hajime nodded but felt pain in his chest like something pierced through his heart. “Ah yeah, how stupid of me. I knew it. He really doesn’t trust me. He only wants my accomplishments. Bullshits.” Hajime’s thoughts go haywire every time his father talks to him.

“We’re going to watch the competition. Don’t waste our time if you’re just going to fail this one. “The man cautioned. 

Hajime stopped eating, “Dad, we haven’t started yet but I feel like a loser already.” The table becomes silent, “Ah shit I said it.” Hajime bites his tongue while his mother squeezed his right, thigh a sign to tell him to stop provoking his father.

“Are you provoking me? Do you think you can boast about your little accomplishments? Well, think twice, my son.” His father kept on talking down to Hajime. His jaw tightened and clenched his fist in order for him to suppress the feeling of remorse and frustration he had.

To ease the tension between the two Mrs. Iwaizumi started talking, “Haj my baby, you know we’re proud of you right? Just keep doing what you always do. You got this.” She affirmed.

“Alisa stop babying him. That’s why he’s weak and dependent.” His father blurted as he sips his coffee. Hajime put all the strength he has at the moment and forced to put up a smile and just ignore what his old man said about him for the past 15 minutes. “Thank you, mom. I’ll do my best.”

That day ended in the worst possible way. I was too preoccupied with the things I’ve heard and I started weighing down my team. We lost at 1 point. A point that I knew I can win but my impulsiveness gets in the way. A point that made my life miserable up until now. A point that made my father look down on me as if I was trash.

−End of Flashback−

“Based on that story you already figured out that I was once an achiever but that was taken from me by that one mistake. That one mistake made me rethink my life decisions. I used to hate myself. Not that I don’t right now but before, it was so overwhelming. I tend to breakdown every time I was alone in my room. I always asked myself when will I ever be good enough for my parents and such. I need to do everything I can just to please people around me but if I didn’t make it, their words suffocate me. I thought love was painful because that’s how I was raised.” Iwaizumi stated.

Oikawa looks at the tipsy Iwaizumi, “Well aren’t we all? There will be moments where we feel off especially with ourselves but I think that doesn’t mean you’re weak. For me it’s the opposite, it means you’re strong because you’re still grounded. You’re acknowledging your weaknesses. You know there’s always room for improvement. I’m proud of you for still hanging on and Haj, let me give you a piece of advice before you love other people you must first love yourself.” he responded.

Iwaizumi chuckles, “That kind sounds bullshit but yeah I understand where you’re coming from. Hahaha”

The night was still young but Oikawa was already knocked out while Iwaizumi is still wide awake, thinking about what Oikawa said, “Love me first huh. I’ll try” He thought.

As the days go by, the closer Iwaizumi and Oikawa got. They become each other’s shoulder to lean on. When either of them got a problem, the other got his back.

Text message 10:45pm

“Iwa-chan are you free tonight?”

“Yeah, I’m done with my work. Why? Miss me?

“Yeah. Hahaha. Let’s drink! It’s on me.”

Based on Oikawa’s replies Iwaizumi knew that this is going to be a long night. Oikawa used to mock Iwaizumi when he started saying cheesy things but this time he just admits it.

-Oikawa’s Apartment 11:15 pm-

*ding dong! *

Iwaizumi rings Oikawa’s doorbell countless times until the guy opened from the opposite side of the door. 

“I’m sorry I was doing something. Come in.”

Iwaizumi followed Oikawa’s footsteps. He was guided to the veranda. Oikawa left to get some drinks and food on his kitchen meanwhile Iwaizumi just looks up at the sky, admiring the beauty of the night sky filled with bright stars.

“Stargazing, Iwa-chan?”

“Yeah, I love looking at the night sky. It feels soothing.”

“For the first time, I agree with you on that.”

Oikawa sat beside Iwaizumi. They’re both sipping their beers silently. Iwaizumi only knew Oikawa for a short amount of time but he already knows that forcing the other guy to talk about his problem will not do anything well. Having this kind of set up helped Iwaizumi to stay calm in every situation and work on his patience. After 15 minutes Oikawa broke the silence.

“Iwa-chan mind if I tell you my story this time?”

“Well do I have a choice?”

“Mean Iwa-chan!”

It may not look like it but Iwaizumi really cares for Oikawa. Like he will do anything just to see that beautiful smile on Oikawa’s face. That smile that makes his knees weak. The smile that keeps driving him crazy. The smile that he loves to see every day. 

“Before meeting you I had been in a long term relationship with this guy named Ushijima. We’re not a perfect couple but I didn’t mind that. I used to think that I can face every obstacle if I had him beside me, holding my hand when I’m scared, sad, or in pain. We were very happy.”

Every word was like a spear that pierced Iwaizumi’s heart. He knew this one coming but it still pains him to hear that from Oikawa. Despite being in pain, he still manages to look at Oikawa while he was talking.

“You know that kind of happiness where you can’t think of anything that can ruin your relationship. I feel contented… Unfortunately, my love wasn’t enough to make him stay. I saw him with some other guy on the day of our 3rd anniversary. He looks so happy... He used to look at me like that...”

Oikawa finally let his guard down and burst into tears. “W-why can’t it be me? I can’t take the loneliness anymore.”

A sting comes from Iwaizumi’s chest at the sight of a vulnerable Oikawa. Looking at this side of Oikawa made Iwaizumi’s pain double. Iwaizumi closes the gap between them. He put his arms on Oikawa’s shoulders and the other one finds its way on Oikawa’s head, helping it to lean on Iwaizumi’s chest.

“Shhh. I know you’re hurting but you’re not alone, okay? I’m not going to leave you.”

His fingers rub circles on Oikawa’s back and as a result, it made Oikawa cry even more.

“You hear my heartbeat? Just focus on that, Tooru.”

Iwaizumi continue what he was doing until Oikawa fell asleep. He positioned Oikawa’s head on his lap. His fingers brushed Oikawa’s hair.  
“I don’t care what they think but for me, you’re perfect.”

He gave Oikawa a kiss on the forehead and he just lets himself get drunk. Everything was overwhelming and all he can do was to let himself intoxicated until he collapses.

After that night Iwaizumi tends to sleepover at Oikawa’s apartment because he wants Oikawa to feel that he wasn’t alone anymore. That he’s there for him at any moment and in any circumstances. And maybe that was one of the best decisions he ever made. He woke up on the couch, rubs his eyes, and find Oikawa. 

“Ah shit. How do I do this?”

Iwaizumi laughs at the sight of Oikawa trying to cook with a plate as a shield. “God I’ll do everything just to see this view every morning.” He mumbles.

“Hey stop looking and help me already Iwa-chan!"

“Okay give me that. From now on let me do the cooking. Just watch from afar.”

“Hmm. I don’t want that.”

Oikawa stood up and walks towards Iwaizumi’s back. He puts his arms around Iwaizumi’s hips and rests his head on Iwaizumi’s shoulder.

“I like it better this way.”

Iwaizumi’s lips curved into a smile. He loves this. Morning routines with the clingy Oikawa. He’s already contented with this kind of life.

Iwaizumi felt really good these past 6 months. He gets really motivated. He started socializing with his officemates, he started smiling, his performance with his work was amazing. He’s one of the reasons why their hotel’s sales skyrocketed. After years of suffering from anxiety and self-doubts, he started to learn how to love himself and gain confidence little by little. He was living his life. And perhaps that phrase is still underrated. The moment he met Oikawa everything around him started going on the right track. He felt nothing but happiness. Maybe this is the best time to try and confess his feelings.

Text message: From Iwa-chan 7:30 am

“True, can we talk later?”

“Of course! I’m always free for you Haj. :)”

-Aoba Avenue Hotel 9:00 am-

Iwaizumi starts his day feeling nothing but warmth and tenderness. He usually arrives earlier than Matsukawa but this time it’s the opposite.

“Looks like something good happen to you. Spill the tea, Sir Haj.”

Matsukawa kept asking what made Iwaizumi looked so happy this day and finally, after putting down his things Iwaizumi decided to give Matsukawa information little by little.  
“I decided to go all out today. I’m going to ask Tooru.”

Iwaizumi proclaimed. It took minutes before Matsukawa processed everything that Iwaizumi planned for tonight. Matsukawa also suggests things to make it more romantic. Both of them were looking forward to tonight but their excitement morphed into seriousness.

“Not to be pessimistic but Haj are you sure Tooru already moved on?”

The smile that has been on Iwaizumi’s face up until now fades.

“I can neither deny nor confirm that but I’m giving this one a shot.”

“You know it’s hard to love someone who isn’t fully recovered about his past. But whatever happens, I’m with you.”

Matsukawa may be teasing him all the time but Iwaizumi wouldn’t choose anyone over him. He’s been there for Iwaizumi since they were kids and in this life-altering moment, all he needs to hear are the kind and honest words that came out from the latter’s mouth. Iwaizumi took up all the strength he had just to form a reassuring smile.

-The Carmen Resto 8:00 pm-

Iwaizumi was nervous. His hands were sweating while waiting for his date. Meanwhile, Oikawa was greeted with a smile and guided to where Iwaizumi is. Oikawa was a bit surprised. While he was walking towards their table the servers were giving him roses. The ambiance was peaceful and romantic. Music started to feel like lullabies that tap on Oikawa’s heart. He didn’t expect that their dinner will be this extravagant. Oikawa took a seat and faced Iwaizumi,

“Haj you don’t need to spend so much on our dinner.”

“No, it’s okay. You deserved this Tooru.”

Iwaizumi holds Oikawa’s hand and gave a soft smile. Their food was served and they started eating in silence. In an attempt to uplift the awkward atmosphere Iwaizumi started talking.

“How was the food?”

“It’s delicious. Thank you, Haj.”

“Toruu, I want to tell you something.”

Oikawa just hummed as a response. 

“Tooru, I love you.”

Oikawa choked about what Iwaizumi said.

“Hey. Slowly. Are you okay?”

“I am, but Haj are you serious? Hahaha.”

“Yeah, I really do, Toruu.”

Oikawa’s smile suddenly fades away. Don’t get him wrong, he likes Iwaizumi too. But he fully knew that he’s still not yet over with Ushijima. It’s as if dozens of needles were stitching his heart, Iwaizumi doesn’t deserve this.

“Haj, I’m sorry but I don’t think I deserved your love.”

Iwaizumi muster up his courage, “Is it because of Ushijima? Tooru I can wait until you can fully give me your heart. Waiting was never a problem for me.”

“I’m not okay with that. You deserved the same love you’re willing to give, Haj. And right now I don’t think I can do it.”

Iwaizumi’s world goes into pitch black. Suddenly he couldn’t hear what Oikawa’s saying anymore after those words come out. Tears fell down on his face. I already imagined this one but it still hurts. It fucking hurts. Iwaizumi mumbles to himself. 

“I-I’m sorry Haj.”

“You can’t love someone unless you love yourself first. Remember that? Before you came in my life I have never loved myself. But when you appeared, without warnings and signs, you made my world upside down. I forgot everything that went wrong in my existence. I met you at a very strange time in my life. I loved you so much I forgot what hating myself felt like. I’m waiting, Tooru.”

“I never meant to hurt you, Iwa-chan. Perhaps, next time, the right people will get the time right and have their chance.”

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank my Ate, @koushkoushi (anitwt acc) for proofreading this fic. If you enjoyed reading this please leave a comment and kudos! Your thoughts are highly appreciated. :)


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